Pregnancy story by Luciminda 

Welcome to the third in a series of  posts written for you by real Mum’s to be.  Each article will share the pregnancy story of one Mum to be, who will each share their labour and delievary experience when baby arrives.  I hope that these real life accounts of pregnacy will help other expectant Mum’s to feel secure in the knowledge that the things they experience and feel during their pregnancy are all normal events and emotions and part of the journey to motherhood.

Lucieminda’s Pregnancy story

Today we meet Lucieminda, a first time Mummy to be.

My husband and I had decided to start trying for a baby in October (2018) and were extremely shocked and happy to see two lines on a cheap pregnancy test the following month, a few days before my period was due. Unfortunately this turned out to be a chemical pregnancy, something many women go through without even realising as women just think they’ve just come on their period a couple of days late. After this happened we decided not to get our hopes up in thinking we would get pregnant fast, we didn’t “try” in November and just decided to see what happened. Christmas Eve came and after attending midnight mass with my family we got home and began late night preparations ready to host Christmas dinner the next morning. Then something told me, I don’t know what it was but something told me to take a test, again, a few days before my period was due. Lo and behold there was a faint line, I immediately took a photo and secretly showed my husband, afraid to get his hopes up again he just smiled and said “we’ll see” and we definitely did. 2am Christmas morning was the first time we saw a glimpse of hope that our lives would change forever.

 

Boxing Day, after a long drive down to Essex to spend the day with my Husbands family, we stopped off at Tesco to buy some flowers for his Nan. We decided to try our luck and buy a ClearBlue digital test too and as soon as we arrived at his Nan’s I snuck off to the toilet and took the test. Anyone who has taken one of these tests before will know how long the loading symbol stays on the tiny screen for, before showing the word PREGNANT. My heart was racing as I waited for it to tell me how far gone I was. 

  Other than the positive tests and the darkening lines of the multiple cheap tests I took for the next week or so, and my missed period, I would never have known I was pregnant. I didn’t feel pregnant, but I was sure I would soon. 

People might think the amount of tests I took was excessive but I didn’t want to see the lines fade like I did last time, so seeing them get darker each day kept my hopes alive. 7 weeks and we decided to have a private scan to not only confirm it, but to also put our minds at rest and allow us to be a little excited. It was the cutest little blob I had ever seen and seeing the flickering heart beat felt so surreal and as I saw the tears build in my husbands eyes I knew this was real for both of us. 

Each week would pass running up to our 12 week scan and I would wait for the dreaded sickness to arrive, but it didn’t, and it still hasn’t at 28 weeks. I felt like it wasn’t normal to feel so well, people had told me that the first trimester is one of the worst and I would struggle to hide the terrible symptoms. The only symptoms I felt during the first trimester were tiredness, and slightly sore breasts right at the beginning. 

12 week scan had arrived and our anxiety hit, praying everything would be okay we tried not to think about it too much. Then this time seeing a baby shaped blob moving around, legs in the air, thumb in mouth, we knew everything was okay. 

We could finally tell the world we were expecting our first child! 

Week 17 we booked a private gender scan as we were so excited to find out the sex of our first baby. Many people, especially the older generation judged me for wanting to know the gender. “You’re ruining the surprise” “It wasn’t an option when I had children” All I can say is that it is your body, your baby and with the pressure of being a first time mum don’t let that hinder your choices.

From day one I was convinced we were having a boy, I could put money on it and I was right! We were and are over the moon to be having a little boy, we would be just as pleased if we were having a girl but knowing he was healthy and being able to imagine him when he would arrive added more to our excitement. 

3 weeks later we had our 20 week scan, the most important scan which checks on the baby’s organs and growth and you can also confirm/find out your baby’s sex. We loved this scan because we saw him on the screen for a while as they checked everything thoroughly, wriggling around, sucking his thumb again and getting himself into awkward positions which made it difficult for the ultrasound technician sometimes.

Second trimester has been a breeze, with my very fast growing bump and lots of wriggles, I am constantly reminded of this miracle inside of me. I don’t take any second of this experience for granted and I am very lucky to not have had any nasty symptoms. It’s getting harder to breathe, I’m getting a little tired and I am well aware this third and final trimester will be hard, but the countdown has begun for when we get to meet our little boy.

I am now 36 weeks and 2 days, not much has changed over the last few weeks as we have prepared for our new arrival. At my 28 week appointment he was measuring 3 weeks too big so I needed a growth scan and indeed he was big, but still within the “normal”. I had a text for gestational diabetes which, thankfully, turned out to be negative, he’s just a big baby. Finishing work was a mix of emotions, sad because I’d be leaving my job 25 miles away for good, but also released that i could prepare for the baby and also nap whenever I wanted. Now it’s just the waiting game, my belly is HUGE and his head is measuring large so hopefully he’s a little earlier than expected. We shall see. 

Thank you to Luciminda for sharing her pregnancy journey.

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I decided to pretend that I was okay and happy. I thought that if I pretend everything is okay that I will then believe it and everything will be fine. I told close friends and family of the news and they were all happy for me. It is nice knowing I had other people around to help support me. 

After speaking to my midwife, she recommended I speak to my doctor about how I felt mentally. He then recommended I contact a couple of companies for counselling. I have now had a couple of sessions of 1 to 1 counselling to help me talk about my worries. It helps being able to speak to someone who doesn’t know me and won’t judge me for how I feel. Everyone is different and have their own ways of dealing with things but for me, I find counselling helpful. 

When it came to my 20 week scan, I wasn’t half as nervous as I was before. I was more nervous about finding out the sex this time. My partner and I told the sonographer we would like to know the sex in which; after a few moments of her checking a few things, she confirmed we will be having a baby boy. 

We are both so excited and starting to get ready for little man’s arrival. We have been thinking of names and also looking at cots, prams etc. I feel I can now focus on the good things and not have to worry that something will go wrong. I don’t want to let my paranoia get the better of me, I want to enjoy the pregnancy and make the most of it.

As I hit 31 weeks, I started to get itchy hands and feet. I discussed this with my doctor and midwife in which, after a few blood tests they have confirmed I have obstetric cholestasis. I am now having to have blood tests every week and have my baby monitored for his heart beat and movement. At first I was worried but; I have got my head around this and thought I am not the only woman to get this. They have prescribed me with cream and allergy tablets to help with the itchiness. Even though this meant that I will not be able to get my water birth I hoped for as I am now consultant led, I know that I will be looked after in the hospital and I can get through anything with my partner.

I certainly feel ready to meet my little boy as the tiredness and aching back/neck kicks in. I only have a couple more weeks at work and then my maternity leave starts – I can’t wait!  I still need to pack my hospital bag but I will get around to this soon! The nursery still needs to be decorated but, as he will be sleeping with us for the first 6 months, we are not rushing to get this done. 

Having my partner and my parents with me through this journey has made it easier for me. I still get paranoid but, with the support of everyone I know I can get through this. Besides, having up and down days are the joys of our hormones in pregnancy! Bring on the labour

Thank you to Sophie for sharing her pregnancy journey.

Sophie used Insight Healthcare to access counselling  which is free to use with NHS - https://www.insighthealthcare.org/our-services/talking-therapies/types-of-therapies/counselling/ 

Sophie has since sent me a message to let me know there little man, Rowan arrived safely on  8th October.  Isn't he just beautiflul.

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